My Gabranth
by bittersweet rhapsody
Summary: CHAPTER THREE UP. Gabranth stiffened, praying that Larsa couldn't hear his racing heart. With his eyes closed, Larsa whispered to him softly, 'I couldn't bear to lose you, Gabranth.' GabranthxLarsa. Rating may be upped.
1. Unreal

My first fic. Ever. And yes, I need criticism badly XD. Be nice and review?

And, uh, if you don't like GabranthxLarsa, you probably shouldn't read this .

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy XII or its characters. Although I would like to. Very much so XD.

On with the fic.  
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"Isn't it absolutely spectacular?" sighed Larsa, resting his gloved hands on the granite rail of the balcony as a gentle breeze played with his dark hair.

"Pardon me, my lord?" Said Gabranth quickly, as his master's voice had caught him off guard.

"The view from here, it's just amazing...and Gabranth, please, how many times must I ask you to call me Larsa?"

"Yes, my lo...Larsa.." Gabranth stuttered. 'I did not just say 'My Larsa'...' he thought, cursing himself.

"Your Larsa, Gabranth?" Larsa repeated with a hint of playfulness in his voice.

"Er, excuse me, my lord, I was going to..I almost said it again but I-" Gabranth stammered.

Larsa laughed to himself. "That's quite alright, my Gabranth"

The judge magister did not respond. He thanked the gods he had his helmet on, Larsa did not need to see the look on his face nor the color currently intensifying in his cheeks. Larsa turned around to enjoy the view yet again, and leaned over the rail to take in the full scene.

"No matter how many times I come out here every morning," he continued, referring to one of the many Archadian balconies of the Palace, "it always takes my breath away." He leaned further out and closed his eyes, appreciating the breeze.

"Lord Larsa," Gabranth said quickly, "please take caution before you fall, the rail is already cracked, and"

Larsa laughed again. "Honestly, Gabranth, you worry far too much, and again, it's just _Larsa_."

The knight closed his eyes and sighed quietly to himself. Why couldn't he seem to pull himself together around his young master anymore? It was almost as if-..._No_, he thought quickly, _banish the idea, Gabranth..._ As his eyes opened again, pulling himself back together was not an option.

"Larsa!" he exclaimed, taking a sudden step towards the boy who was now _sitting on the edge_ of the much-too-damaged balcony rail. Startled, Larsa turned quickly to face his guardian, and, to Gabranth's horror, lost his balance and began to slip. Gabranth's heart plummeted to his stomach as he sprinted towards Larsa, eyes widening as the already cracked rail began to split. The scene seemed to play out in slow motion. As Larsa began to fall, Gabranth lunged towards him, and grasped his hand as the two slipped over the edge. With his other arm, Gabranth flailed out and caught the edge of the balcony, now trying desperately to support his and Larsa's weight with his metal-clad fingertips.

"Oh gods..._oh gods_!" Larsa exclaimed as he tried not to gaze down at the not-so-magnificent-anymore view of the gardens thirty feet below him. Gabranth's grip was beginning to loosen. With as much strength as he could gather, he swung Larsa inward, and then swung him again over his head, sending him flying and landing on the pieces of granite lying on the floor of the balcony. This cost Gabranth his grip, and he plummeted downwards. The last thing he heared was Larsa's despairing voice screaming his name.

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A ragged sound pierced the stale silence. It ceased, and began again. Again it ceased, again it began. It was such a strange sound, accompanied by a rattle every few seconds. It was this sound that pulled Gabranth out of his induced sleep. Startled, he sat straight up and took in a sharp breath, realizing that the horrid sound _was_ his breathing. A sharp pain shot through him like a bullet, and he slumped back down, nauseated. He tried to lift his arms, but they felt so unexplainably heavy, as did his legs. He reached down to remove his armor but couldn't, as he then realized it wasn't there. Even more startled, his eyes flew open and he looked down at his feet, which were covered by a blanket. Looking around the room, he finally grasped reality and with relief, he realized where he was. With a thankful sigh, he closed his eyes and rested again in one of the many beds of the palace's infirmary. The peace didn't last long, as he felt intense pressure building up in his chest, and he began coughing a raspy cough that didn't alleviate the pressure. Opening his eyes once more he glanced down at his chest which was firmly bandaged. Sighing again, he was grateful that he no longer had his armor on. He was beginning to drift off once more when he heard shouting in the hallway.

"For gods' SAKE, Drace, let me BE"

"B-but my lord, you really should rest"

"Thank you, Drace, but I am perfectly capable of deciding for myself. Take your leave"

"...Yes, my lord"

As heavy, clanging footsteps faded, the door to the infirmary swung open and Larsa stepped through.  
"...Gabranth?" He said softly, looking around the large room for him. "Gabranth!" Larsa spotted his guardian and ran towards him, with somewhat of a limp.

"L-lord Larsa..." The judge magister stuttered in a weak, coarse voice. He suddenly felt extremely self conscious...almost naked. In the presence of Larsa, without his armor, without his sword, without his helmet.

Larsa grasped the knight's bare hand, startling him. "Oh Gabranth..." whispered Larsa. Gabranth looked into the young lord's eyes and was surprised to see that they were filled with tears. Gabranth averted his eyes immediately, as he was not sure what he was feeling...akwardness to be sure. Was it just him or were the bandages getting tighter and tighter?

"My Lord," the exposed judge began in a raspy yet soft voice, "I..."

"No," said Larsa quickly, "it's okay, you don't have to speak"

Gabranth exhaled, not sure what to think.

"Are you...are you badly injured?" asked Larsa meekly, looking into his guardian's face, searching for emotion.

"N-not badly," he replied, but his face informed Larsa otherwise.

"Oh Gabranth, look at you.." Larsa muttered with pain in his voice. His eyes looked up and down the knight's body, and Gabranth felt another pang of self consciousness..

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"Gabranth, I...I'm so sorry..." Larsa choked, and to the judge's surprise, a tear glistened and fell to his cheek. Gabranth's heart swelled and without thinking he raised a hand to the boy's face and wiped the tear away. As he did, Larsa quickly brought his hand to Gabranth's and held it, and as the young heir looked at his protector, Gabranth realized what he just did and pulled his hand away.

"I...forgive me, I...y-you"

"It's okay," Larsa said softly, sitting on Gabranth's bed. He looked up at the ceiling, his eyes filling with tears again. "It's all my fault, Gabranth"

Gabranth raised a hand to the lord Larsa's shoulder. "Do not take the blame upon yourself my Lord." To his utter shock, Larsa lied down next to him and rested his head on his knight's shoulder. He reached around and grasped the judge's opposite shoulder, as if pulling him closer. Gabranth stiffened, and prayed to the gods that Larsa couldn't hear his racing heart. With his eyes closed, Larsa whispered softly into Gabranth's ear.  
"_I couldn't bear to lose you, Gabranth_"

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Eesh, I hope that wasn't too bad. Please please please review, I need them to continue, and make sure to tell me what you want in the next chapter .


	2. Forbidden

Chapter Two. I was going to discontinue this, as it is my first fic and I really don't think it's all that good, and I have my other fic to work on...but what's the harm in throwing a few more chapters for this one? 

Disclaimer: I own nothing. (Such an easy disclaimer, don't you think? XD)

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"I couldn't bear to lose you, Gabranth..." Larsa whispered, his breath making the hairs on the back of Gabranth's neck stand on end.

Gabranth was lost for words. He couldn't help it if his breathing quickened, if his heart raced, if his pupils dilated. Here was his lord and master whispering to him like he..._stop thinking like this, Gabranth!_

"You do not want me here, Gabranth?" Larsa said, sitting up somewhat and gazing into Gabranth's eyes deeply. Gabranth could see hurt in those beautiful eyes.

"N-no, not at all my Lord!" he managed to stammer.

Larsa's eyes lit up. His face drew nearer.

"Good." Larsa's face drew nearer still. Gabranth's heart was pounding against his chest, surely it would tear the bandages wrapped so tightly around him. His eyes widened and tried to speak but no sound escaped his mouth. He looked into Larsa's eyes. _How different they look up close..._

Larsa placed his hand on Gabranth's heart. "It is racing furiously...what are you thinking of, Gabranth?" he asked with the slightest of smiles on his face. Gabranth could only gaze at him.

"Speechless as well? Then surely..." he paused for a moment and brushed a bit of Gabranth's hair off of his forehead as he leaned even closer.

"...surely you feel the same as I do...Noah," he said, his words making Gabranth's lips tingle and his mind go wild at the sound of his name, the name he abandoned so long ago.

He felt his heart would burst as he felt Larsa breath against his lips, eyes fixed so intently on his. _This cannot be happening_, he thought. But it was. Larsa closed the short distance between their lips as they touched ever so slightly. Larsa's beautiful eyes closed and leaned into the soft kiss a bit more, but not too much. The two breathed in unison, sharing the same breath, mouths still slightly open. Larsa slipped his hand under Gabranth's head, and suddenly pulled him forward, slipping his tongue through Gabranth's lips. Gabranth was lost and dizzy, unsure whether it was from his injuries or from Larsa occupying his lips. He opened his mouth a bit for Larsa but did not have the ability to kiss him back...he was concentrating far more on the hand brushing his side, going lower...lower...lower still...under the covers and...and then the strangest sensation hit him...not from Larsa, but from some unidentifiable force that seemed to take hold of his shoulders and shake him wildly. He heard Larsa calling out his name, but from a distance, and he didn't know how for Larsa couldn't exactly speak at the moment, and then...

Gabranth's eyes flew open and he was gazing not at the infirmary ceiling, but into the open skies.

"Oh thank the gods!" Larsa explained as he took hold of Gabranth's shoulders and pulled him forward in a simple embrace. Gabranth did not speak. Words were not something coming to him easy as of late, after all. Gabranth sat up and put an arm out behind him for support. A searing pain ripped through his core, and he put a hand to the right side of his waist and realized that his armor had been punctured and blood was covering his metal-clad palm. Larsa saw the gash as well.

"Gods, Gabranth, you should have let me fall!" Larsa exclaimed, furious at himself for letting such a foolish action cause an accident like this.

"I could never think of it, lord Larsa," Gabranth said slowly in a hoarse voice, his attention still on the wound in his side.

"We have to get this off, Gabranth," Larsa said with intense concern in his voice, grabbing hold of Gabranth's armor.

"I...I will be fine, L-Larsa, there is really no ne-"

"Gabranth I order you to take this off before you bleed to your death," Larsa said firmly, trying not to let the fear escape through his voice.

Gabranth could not disobey such a direct order. As he took his gloves off, Larsa lifted off his iron helm and looked into his guardian's eyes for the first time in what must have been over two years. Gabranth felt the wind against his face and inhaled the cool air that he so longed for in the long Archadian summer days. Larsa took a kerchief from one of his various pockets and began to wipe the blood oozing from Gabranth's nose. Gabranth flinched at his touch; his nose was surely broken.

"Gabranth, your armor," Larsa reminded him firmly, but his lips quivered as he tried not to let tears come to his eyes.

Taking off his armor in front of Larsa was the last thing Gabranth wanted to do, lying in the middle of the Gardens, in the line of vision of any staff member of the palace who happened to be looking out one of the several windows on this side of the palace. He prayed there was no such person. He hooked his fingers around the bottom of his breastplate and pulled, hearing the click of it disengaging from the rest of his armor. Larsa took hold of it and helped to lift it over his head. Next came the shoulder guards, and soon anything else that obscured his body. Gabranth was left in a tight sleeveless shirt that exposed his muscular arms, well built from the hours upon hours of training with his sword. He tried not to look at the blood seeping from his side. Larsa was quick to remove the rest of his armor from his legs.

"Can you stand?" he asked, taking Gabranth's hand.

Gabranth tried his best to stand, and appeared to be successful until his knees buckled and he began to sink down to the ground, but Larsa caught him and pulled him back up as best he could. He swung Gabranth's arm over his shoulder and started to walk. Gabranth looked down and saw the blood now staining Larsa's clothes. Larsa seemed to read his mind.

"It matters not, Gabranth," he said, pulling open a large wooden door as he half dragged Gabranth into the palace.

"DRACE!" Larsa called out, yelling for the older knight to aid him. He heard metallic footsteps in the distance. "DRACE!" he yelled again, and to his relief she turned the corner just then and sprinted down the long marble hall towards them. Larsa let Gabranth down gently and knelt down as Drace reached him.

"_Gods_, Noah, what happened to you?!" she exclaimed, taking her helm off and casting it aside.

"I'll be fine, Katrin," Gabranth whispered to the older woman, not a day past fifty.

"Ridiculous," Drace said, hoisting Gabranth to his feet once more, putting an arm around his waist as he reached for her shoulder. Drace set off quickly for the infirmary, with Larsa trailing behind. They turned corner after corner and finally reached their destination. She went to the nearest bed and lifted Gabranth on to it. He was feeling so dizzy from the loss of blood and his vision started to blur and his eyelids drooped.

"Stay awake, Noah!" Drace exclaimed, shaking his shoulder. Larsa looked at her in fear; he had never seen Drace anything but calm and composed, now here she was, just as afraid as he. Gabranth's eyelids closed fully.

"Noah!" Drace yelled again, shaking his shoulder to no avail. "Larsa," she said, turning to him quickly. He saw the fear in her face and his knees trembled. "Keep him awake, I'm going to get the medics. Use this." she handed him a bottle of potion, but it was two-thirds empty. Larsa climbed onto the bed and knelt beside Gabranth as he uncorked the potion and poured the rest of its contents on the wound. He saw it close slightly and the bleeding slowed, but it flowed still at a dangerous pace.

"Gabranth," Larsa said sharply, leaning in close to his face. Gabranth opened his eyes somewhat, slowly turning to look at him with empty, tired eyes.

"Stay awake, Gabranth!" Larsa exclaimed, his own shoulders shaking. "Please!" Tears rolled down his face and he carelessly wiped them away with his arm. Gabranth exhaled and closed his eyes again. Larsa's heart dropped. "Stay with me, Gabranth! Stay here!" he said in a shaky voice, a sob racking his body. He looked at the door praying that Drace would come back soon. Where the bloody hell were the medics?!

"Please, Gabranth, please!" Larsa begged, now screaming as his voice cracked. He could barely take a breath. He put his arm behind Gabranth's neck and pulled him up. Gabranth opened his eyes again, his facial expression unchanged and his mouth slightly open. He felt his strength waning away but registered what was happening as he saw tears stream down from Larsa's glistening eyes.

"I...will be..." he managed to say, unable to keep his eyes open anymore. At this point he no longer had any clue how much blood he had lost.

"You what?" Larsa said, pushing him to speak, or open his eyes, or anything else to keep his guardian with him.

"D...don...worry...I...will...be fine," he whispered.

Larsa pulled Gabranth closer, their foreheads touching as he weeped like a child.

"Please, Gabranth...I couldn't bear to lose you..."

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A much longer chapter, I must say, I really couldn't find a good place to cut it off until here...but oh well.

And remember, reviews make the world go round. .


	3. I Cannot

I'm so sorry this took so long, with getting a job and all this crap with school...I got so far behind. I'll try harder not to put it off x.x.

usual disclaimer.

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Gabranth awoke to the painful sensation of his beating heart against the tight bandages embracing his chest. As he looked around, he noticed several empty glass potion bottles, his armor neatly cleaned and set upon their proper hangars, and a young sovereign-to-be asleep in a chair with his head resting on the bed, his shoulders rising and falling with each breath he took.

"Lo-" Gabranth croaked. His throat burned; he could not speak. However the half word he had uttered stirred Larsa immediately, and his head came straight up, his dark eyes tired.

"Gabranth," Larsa breathed. He clumsily stood, knocking over his chair in the process, and darting to Gabranth's side. "Are you well?" he asked quickly, his eyes darting quickly between Gabranth's. He slowly nodded once and Larsa exhaled heavily in relief.

"Thank the gods," he said, resting his hand on Gabranth's arm. Larsa smiled sweetly. "I was afraid I would have to live out the rest of my life in solitude," he continued in a stronger voice, and chuckled at the look on Gabranth's face. "You know very well that you are the best friend I could possibly hope to ever have, Gabranth." Gabranth's heart skipped a beat.

"My lord," Gabranth managed to say. "It is...an honor..."

Larsa smiled again. "Gabranth. Though you are my most trusted confidant, I fear you will have to find another job if you call me 'lord' once more."

Gabranth gave a weak half smile, and hoping his voice wouldn't crack, he said, "Very well, Larsa."

Larsa laughed and grasped the knight's hand. "That's better."

Gabranth couldn't make sense of Larsa's actions. The dream of course, had been strictly his own thoughts, but why in Ivalice was he thinking such things? Larsa was his lord, his master, and to think of him as more or less would be inappropriate. Their relationship was meant to be nothing but one between the defender and the defended. However, he had to admit to himself that something inside him stirred when he thought of the future emperor, of the man he would become, but he could not identify the exact feeling. The entire situation was maddening. And what alarmed him the most was the fact that every time Larsa released his grasp on him or removed his light touch, he wanted, no, needed it back.

And the way Larsa was acting towards him did not relieve his apprehension.

A sharp knock was heard at the door, startling both of them. Larsa whipped his hand away and averted his gaze immediately, as if he were afraid to be caught in an indecent act. Gabranth's heart was still beating furiously.

"Enter," said Larsa, but his voice wavered, and he refused to look Gabranth in the eye.

What in Ivalice is running through his mind?, Gabranth thought in exasperation.

A thin medic with her hair pulled tightly back entered, followed by Drace. The medic carried a glass bottle filled with an iridescent liquid and set it on Gabranth's bedside table.

"Ah, you are awake," she stated. Gabranth opened his mouth to respond but the medic uncorked the bottle and spoke again, "Are you feeling any better?" Again Gabranth took a breath to answer her but the curt woman did not seem to care.

"Drink this," she ordered, holding out the bottle. Gabranth sat up slowly and grimaced. The wound in his side still burned and movement aggravated it immensely. He took the bottle and began to drink the awful liquid and the nurse seemed pleased.

"I will check back in an hour," she said, and with that, she was off, shutting the door rather loudly behind her. Drace raised an eyebrow.

"Friendly, isn't she?" she said, and Gabranth laughed out loud. He was quite fond of Drace, working together had brought them close and although there was quite an age different, he considered her as the sister he never had. She turned to face him.

"How are you?" she asked in a more serious tone.

"Never better," Gabranth replied, still grimacing from the pain in his side. Drace scoffed.

"I doubt that," she retorted, rolling her eyes, but she shook her head, smiled, and took his hand. From the corner of his eye, Gabranth swore he saw a fleeting glint of jealousy in Larsa's face. "But I think you'll be alright if you stop diving off balconies," Drace continued. "Bad for your health. Anyway, I must be going, Vayne said something about a dinner tonight and he no doubt needs an extra pair of hands to order around." And with that, she stood and left the room.

Larsa still looked upset. "The both of you certainly seem fond of each other," he said darkly, and he was almost pouting.

"She is a good friend," Gabranth replied, and again a flash of jealousy seemed to cross the boy's face, and worried, he quickly added, "but nothing more than that, of course." Larsa seemed to relax.

"Good."

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Over the next few days, Larsa was with Gabranth during his every waking moment. When he was released from the infirmary, Larsa insisted on accompanying Gabranth on his walks through the palace gardens in the morning. Gabranth couldn't understand the cause of Larsa's sudden and constant presence. He enjoyed it, of course, but it was certainly odd behavior and Gabranth could not get over the awkward feeling that was always in the back of his mind. However, he did not comment on it.

"What did your nurse say about the wound in your side today?" Larsa quietly asked his guardian one early morning in the gardens.

"It is fully healed, but of course the scar will not disappear," Gabranth replied.

"She cannot do anything about it?" Larsa said, slightly annoyed.

"It is only a scar, Larsa."

Gabranth caught Larsa's slight smile at the sound of his name, but soon it disappeared.

"Is it bad?"

"I am sure it will improve."

"May I see it?"

Gabranth was sure he misheard. "Excuse me, my lo-Larsa?"

"May I see the scar?"

Gabranth stopped. He couldn't refuse Larsa, and he certainly didn't want to, but if anyone saw him...it was in the middle of the gardens, for occurias' sake!

"I-I suppose so," he stuttered, and, very self-consciously, he pulled up one side of his shirt.

"Gods," breathed Larsa, and he lightly touched Gabranth's side, and it was all Gabranth could do to stop the shudder flying up his spine.

Gabranth was terrified. Terrified of being seen, terrified of Larsa's thoughts, but most of all, terrified of the fact that he so enjoyed the young lord's touch.

"Gabranth?" Larsa's voice startled him back into the present. Gabranth looked down at the Solidor youth. "You seem...uneasy."

"You could assume so," Gabranth said quietly, truthfully.

"Why is that?" Larsa pressed. Gabranth's heart sped up and his face flushed. He felt like a child in a game of truth-or-dare with a secret he couldn't keep.

"I-well, it's-..." Gabranth stuttered. His power of speech? Gone with the wind.

Larsa stopped walking, and Gabranth followed suit. "Gabranth?" A hint of excitement surrounded Larsa. "Is it me?"

_Of course not!_, Gabranth wanted to say, _Never!_, he wanted to exclaim. But all he could do was avert his gaze and stutter.

"It is me," Larsa concluded. The beginnings of a smile became visible. "Do I make you nervous, Gabranth?"

This could not be happening. How could he deny the truth? He merely lowered his gaze and tried to think of a proper explanation.

"It's just that," Gabranth began, his hands shaking and his body temperature rising, "we have been spending so much time together lately, a-and-"

Larsa sat down on the bench and tugged at Gabranth's sleeve once, indicating him to sit down. He did.

"How do you feel towards me, Gabranth?"

Gabranth sighed heavily and closed his eyes. "Larsa, I-"

Before he knew what was happening, Larsa had placed a gloved hand on the side of Gabranth's head, pulled to the side, and crashed his lips against the knight's. Despite his shock, it was too short of an eternity before Larsa pulled back.

Amazingly, Gabranth retained the power to speak. "Larsa, I-"

"It's perfectly fine, Gabranth," Larsa said eagerly, his dark eyes searching Gabranth's. "I feel the same way, you are my best friend, my protector, and I do not care who sees, but I want you to be more"

"I-I cannot, Larsa...if your brother...if anyone saw," he said, exasperated.

"I do not care!" Larsa exclaimed with one hand finding it's way around Gabranth's neck, and he pulled nearer once again, but Gabranth stood up and backed away.

"I cannot, Larsa!" he said forcefully, although his mind was screaming the opposite. Larsa stood up to face him, anger and hurt in his eyes.

"No one has to know!" he said loudly in the most powerful voice he could muster. He advanced again towards the judge magister.

Gabranth pushed Larsa back with both of his hands. "I CANNOT!"

Larsa stumbled back, shocked. The angry aura surrounding Larsa could have burned Gabranth. Gabranth realized what he had just done.

"Forgive me, Larsa, I-"

"You will address me as lord Larsa, judge magister Gabranth," Larsa said cooly.

"I-yes, my lord, but pl-" Gabranth stopped in mid sentence. Larsa had turned on his heels and walked down the garden's winding path and into the night.

_What have I done?_

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Xskdjfoaiwejfalsdkfjoaeiwjfaoidjflkj. Seems that lately for everything I write there's at least one chapter that I absolutely hate.

Please tell me what I can improve on x.X


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